Hello. This is me, Harriet. That’s my son, Johnny, and the other one’s the Hub.
Why do we look so happy? Well, it’s his second birthday. It’s also twelve days before the start of a brand new year: 2013. And just six days before Christmas. Oh, and unbeknownst to us, one day before this email dropped into my account and turned everything a bit upside down:
So that’s how we came to look at our bank account, our routines, the insides of our fridge, wardrobes and toy box… and realise that we were being taken for a ride that had started on the day we discovered I was pregnant.
That £500 buggy with cappuccino holder that everyone in our NCT class had nervously queued up to shelled our for… Did it make Johnny’s colic any less earsplitting? Had it made us or him any happier? Most of all: did I want him to learn that his happiness depended on this mountain of accumulated crap?
We looked into it and the statistics looked kind of… embarrassing. Average annual cost of a child rises to £8,307! screamed headlines in 2012. A typical baby owns 56 outfits worth £327… 13 million toys in landfill every year… Infant ready meal market growing by 23% year on year…
Grown-ups, give yourself a slap and ask yourself: when did we become so dependent on all this spending and all this crap to raise our kids? And isn’t lots of it, really, getting in the way of the real job: just… you know… interacting with them ourselves?
What does it all teach them, after all? Do we want them to learn that maxing out credit cards and keeping up with trends is the meaning of life?
This blog is the story of my attempt to stick to the new year’s resolution we then made: to try to raise a child for a year without spending ANY money (but having just as much fun).
Will 2013 be the year we said “No” to the Ocado lorries full of tiny smoothies apparently blended with flecks of organic gold and rice cakes at double the price because they are half the size… and all ate the same meals as a family?
The year we told soft play centres where to stick their germ-smeared ball ponds and made our own fun at home with friends?
The year we realised he didn’t ‘need’ yet another tractor, or a scooter, or a toddler iPad. What he needed was the space and help to use and develop his imagination. And to do that, he didn’t require this season’s Baby Gap. He required, basically, to be warm and dry in hand-me-downs to explore the (still, for the moment, free) world around him.
The year, in essence, that we asked ourselves the big question: Can we raise one small child without the help of an army of big corporations? And realised that the answer was…. Um, durrrr.
Some of our mothers did it. Most of their mothers did. Mothers all over the rest of the world are doing it right now.
Yes we can, ladies, yes we can.
(At least I think we can. I hope we can… Can we?! Oh god, this is going to be hard work, isn’t it?)



Love it! I am sure it can be done.
Vivie only yesterday opened the scooter we bought for her second birthday in November – the only thing she wanted to do at Christmas was play with her cousins, and for her bday, she wanted “a blue balloon”. God i hope that lasts . . . . .
Just read your article published 28 Jan in the newspaper The Times in South Africa. When my daughter was born I collected all sorts of plastic tops from deodorants, spray cans, coffee bottles etc – assorted colours and shapes, and they were kept in a small plastic basket. She spent hours and hours playing with these (with me and then on her own). The colours and noise (rattling) caught her attention and slowly it progressed to her sorting out shapes and colours, building and balancing them, etc. After each play session, they were easily thrown back into the basket. These were also used during bath time – great fun – they floated and/or sank, water poured from one into another….. All I can say is that these plastic tops (not tiny bottle tops of course) cost me nothing but gave so much pleasure to my daughter and of course, whilst playing, she was learning both mentally and physically. Then of course she started “dishing them out” into pots and pans……..I could go on and on, but think I have put the message across.
I absolutely love this idea! I’m definitely going to use some of your ideas when our daughter arrives (2 days ’til due date). I qualified as a teacher when I left uni, so have always been a collector of activity ideas that cost very little or are free. I’m on pinterest – this link is to my board dedicated to fun activities if you’re interested.
http://pinterest.com/beclovesmike/activities-for-kids-and-big-kids/
Good luck with everything!
A tip for the future…when they really “need” the designer trainers, new phone etc, negotiate and if it seems a reasonable request agree, but say “I’ll go halves with you”That always worked for us!
Hey just to let you know I love this blog after reading the article on Parentdish. I’ve joined and also written a commentary based on my own situation giving links to the article and your site. Here’s the link if you are interested in reading it:
http://kenthinksaloud.wordpress.com/2013/01/29/bringing-a-child-up-for-free-breaking-the-tyranny-of-the-must-buy-culture/
Best wishes for your future with Johnny!
Ken
Good Luck to you and your family. I love to see all of the new projects out there taking off and I love that you have gotten some great media as it brings more attention to those of us trying to reduce our consumption in some way or another. Can’t wait to see how it unfolds.
LOVE this!! Have toddler & newborn & will be following you with much interest
What a simply brilliant idea! I shall watch with keen interest….
Just wanted to say that I think this is a fabulous project.
I has really made think about what I spend on and the way I interact with my son (19 months). I’ve realised that he doesn’t need much to be happy, playing in the park or chasing friends round the house on rainy days makes him just as happy as the mountain of toys bought for him by us and others for Christmas and “just because”
My new motto is “no more consumption for consumptions sake”, we will buy things like clothes for him if he needs them but will I definatley put more thought into these purchases than I used to.
Well done to you for getting some many people thinking and doing and saving.
re: hair cutting. Get yourself a Home Hair Cutting Set such as the Breville brand, here in Oz. Mine, about 30 Bucks, had it for years,
usually come with instructions these days. Cheers
read an article last weekend in our Perth, Australia newspaper about this blog etc. I just wanted to say I have been a drama teacher for the last 8 years for children in primary school. in that time I used many props, costumes and gimmicks, but found over and over the things that really got the kids imagination going, them playing together and using their imagination were 1) Cardboard boxes, the bigger the better 2) 4 large pieces of different coloured material 3) try simple little satin skirts that were very rarely used as actual skirts. I have taken a year off but am totally convinced i could teach a successful drama class using absolute minimum things, but the cardboard boxes would be essential. I think kids are so over stimulated today and fed with a barrage of input from media and technology that they are stifled in bringing things out from them, so much is sensory overload going ‘at them’ instead of imagination coming out ‘from them’. You are spot on in what you are doing and your child will be better off for it!!!!!
Oh Gawd….the guilt. I AM going to learn how to bake. The snacks in particular have to go. My small boy growing at a spectacular rate so will be bankrupt if I replace all his clothes. I like the DIY doll’s house we might do that on a rainy afternoon….
This blog is one of the most exciting ideas I’ve read so far in 2013…inspiring and doable
Really enjoying your blog and congrats on your news! Neither of my children have new clothes or toys – with 12 cousins we are in the best place for hand me downs. Also i haaate the way companies target new parents. Best of luck!
This looks brilliant Hattie! Do hope you’re in Norfolk this weekend – would love to talk to you about all of this. Lots of love and great to hear from you. XXX